“The pain of parting is nothing to the joy of meeting again.”

Charles Dickens

“On meurt deux fois, je le vois bien :

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Cesser d’aimer & d’ĂȘtre aimable,

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C’est une mort insupportable :

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Cesser de vivre, ce n’est rien.”. Source

This poignant verse captures a profound human truth. Many people attribute these powerful words to the great novelist Charles Dickens. The sentiment certainly echoes the emotional depth found in his stories. However, the quote presents a fascinating literary puzzle. It speaks of two deaths: the death of the heart and the death of the body. Furthermore, it suggests the emotional end is far more painful than the physical one. This idea resonates deeply with themes of love, loss, and longing that are central to the human experience.

Let’s explore the quote’s powerful meaning. We will also uncover its surprising origin and understand why it remains so closely linked to Dickens’ legacy.

. Charles Dickens – Victorian Web

The Two Deaths: An Unbearable Loss

The quote presents a stark comparison. It argues that we experience two distinct kinds of death. The first is an emotional death. This happens when we cease to love and, consequently, cease to be lovable. The author calls this demise “insupportable,” or unbearable. Indeed, a life without connection, affection, or warmth can feel like a hollow existence. It is a state of profound isolation that strips away the very essence of what makes us feel alive and human.

In contrast, the second death is the physical act of dying. The quote dismisses this with a striking finality: “Cesser de vivre, ce n’est rien”—to cease living is nothing. This doesn’t necessarily trivialize physical death. Instead, it elevates the importance of our emotional lives. The author suggests that a life devoid of love is already a form of death. Therefore, the ultimate physical end is merely a final, less significant event. This perspective forces us to consider what truly constitutes a life well-lived.

The True Origin of the Words

While the quote’s sentiment feels perfectly at home in a Dickens novel, he did not write it. The verse actually comes from a French playwright and poet. Antoine-Vincent Arnault penned these lines in his 1791 play, Les Souvenirs et les Regrets (Memories and Regrets). . This misattribution is common for powerful, anonymous-feeling quotes that capture a universal emotion. People often connect them to authors known for exploring such deep feelings. Source

Arnault’s work, though less known today than Dickens’, clearly had a grasp on the human condition. The quote’s journey through history shows how a powerful idea can detach from its original source. It becomes a piece of shared wisdom. Consequently, its connection to Dickens is a testament to his own reputation as a master of emotional storytelling. The themes of the quote align so perfectly with his work that the attribution feels correct, even if it is factually inaccurate. Antoine-Vincent Arnault – Bibliothùque nationale de France

Why We Connect This Quote to Dickens

So, why does this French verse stick so stubbornly to an English novelist? The answer lies in the heart of Dickens‘ literary universe. His novels are filled with characters who suffer unbearable emotional pain. Think of Miss Havisham in Great Expectations. She stopped loving and being loved after her betrayal. Subsequently, she lived in a state of emotional death for decades, a ghost in her own home.

Similarly, Sydney Carton in A Tale of Two Cities experiences a profound transformation through love. His love for Lucie Manette redeems his otherwise wasted life. It gives him a purpose that transcends his own physical existence. Charles Dickens – The Victorian Web masterfully showed that a life without love was the ultimate tragedy. His characters constantly grapple with the pain of parting, lost connections, and the hope for reunion. Therefore, Arnault’s words about an “unbearable death” of the heart could have easily been spoken by one of Dickens’ own creations. The thematic overlap is so strong that the popular misattribution becomes understandable.