Quotes by Chris Rock

“Relationships: easy to get into, hard to maintain. Why are they so hard to maintain? Cause it’s hard to keep up the lie. ‘Cause you can’t get nobody being you. You got to lie to get somebody. You can’t get nobody lookin’ like you look, actin’ like you act, soundin’ like you sound. That’s right, when you meet somebody for the first time, you’re not meeting them. You’re meeting their representative!”

Topics: burchard, easy, hinton

“Women always ready to settle down. Shit, a woman goes on four good dates, she’s like “

Topics: already, always, down

“You could get rid of all the crack, all the herb, all the blow, you know what would happen? People would just think of new ways of getting high. That’s right, guys would go in their basement and become scientists, like “

Topics: blows, crack, happen

“You know what men want? Food, sex, silence. That’s it. That’s it. Food, sex, silence. “

Topics: food, history, knowing

“There ain’t a white man in this room that would change places with me. None of ya! None of ya would change places with me…and I’m rich! That’s how good it is to be white.”

Topics: change, droom, history

“You know what’s fucked up about taxes? You don’t even pay taxes. They take tax. You get your check, money gone. That ain’t a payment, that’s a jack.”

Topics: about, even, fucked

“A man gonna be a man. A man is basically as faithful as his options. That’s how faithful a man is, no more, no less.”

Topics: anymore, basically, faithful

“Drug dealers don’t sell drugs. Drugs sell themselves. It’s crack. It’s not an encyclopedia. It’s not a fuckin’ vacuum cleaner. You don’t really gotta try to sell crack, ok? I never heard a crack dealer goin’ “

Topics: dealers, drug, drugs

“We got some platonic friends. I got some, but they’re all by accident. Every platonic friend I got is some woman I was tryin’ to fuck, I made a wrong turn somewhere, and ended up in the friend zone.”

Topics: accident, friends, history

“Everybody talking ’bout gun control, gotta get rid of the guns. Fuck that, I like guns. You got a gun, you don’t have to work out.”

Topics: about, controls, everybody

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